Learning to Breathe

School started this week. I'm not complaining because I had the best summer of my life. But, I quickly realized a few things as I have gone back to the daily grind.

I realized how much I miss Geneva. I miss my friends. I miss second graders. I miss working for my principal. I miss being trusted with my own classroom. A few tears have been shed and my darling husband has been so nice to just listen to me whine.

I have realized that first graders and second graders are a world apart. I love the little ones, but I was in for a shock that first day. To their credit I think I only had 3 kids cry. (After what their parents told me, I was planning on many more!) I have never met kids that are not phased by anything. I have a group of really cute kids that want to learn and want to please, and then I have this group of boys that is going to be the death of me. NOTHING PHASES THEM! They laugh when I discipline them. When I ask them to walk with "quiet feet" they stomp. Completely defiant, and they try to argue with me. If I say it's white, they say it's black. We had to have the "I'm the teacher, I went to college" talk today. I don't think it made a dent. On the positive note, I didn't cry today like I did the first day!

I am working at the after school program a few days a week. So far I have actually looked forward to going. It's fun to meet the older kids, to just hang out with the students and unwind. I figured since Tay was going to be in class till 10 I'd better keep myself occupied.

I don't mean to sound negative. I love my job. I really do. All the hugs, the drawings the kids make for me, the smiles, make up for all these rough moments. I wouldn't trade what I do for anything. It has been the most rewarding thing I have ever done. I love working with disadvantaged kids, because the rewards are that much greater. It's going to be a long first week, but I'm going to make it. I'll be darned if these kids are the end of me. I'll show em!

P.S. Thanks to all who have called and texted with your support. Your love means the world.

Random Musings

So lately I have been thinking. Bear with me and my random thoughts:

-It is HECKA hot here. We are talking 100+ with humidity to top it all off. We have gotten used to being sweaty. When we work out I am literally SOAKING! But it kinda makes me feel like I worked harder than I really did!

-Our neighbors above us are the HEAVIEST WALKERS EVER! It honestly sounds like they weigh 600 pounds and have bricks strapped onto their feet! Either that or they just like to stomp around just to bug us.

-I am slowly coming into this whole "wife" thing. I love to cook, but am constantly complaining about how it takes an hour to cook dinner, 15 minutes to eat, and then 30 minutes to clean up. I have been enjoying trying new reciepies. We have had Ranch Pork Roast, Cafe Rio (homemade!), Honey Chicken Drumsticks, Tortilla Soup, and other fun things.

-It's funny how we divide up the "home" tasks. We never really talked about it but Taylor does the laundry and takes out the trash. I cook dinner (not all the time). We both share on all the other household duties. I consider myself SO lucky to have a husband that will do the laundry (and is willing to pull out all my laundry that doesn't get dried).

-Poor Taylor is starting to get bored. He doesn't start school for another two weeks. He has really taken to my church history books. And there is always the X-box to keep him entertained. He's always relieved when I come home from work cause he doesn't have to entertain himself anymore!

-I have been working like crazy in my classroom and feeling like a first year teacher all over again. I guess I got so comfortable at my old school, and I am getting frustrated with myself because I can't "read" my principal. After a minor scare that I may have to move schools and possibly grades because of enrollment, I have been able to breathe and focus. I love my job, but sometimes I wonder WHY anyone would want to do this. Like today, when I had to sit through my THIRD new teacher training. Gotta love it.

-I visited an experienced teacher's classroom where everything was already set up, and the room looked very homey. I realized that my classroom is not ready, I'm not ready either. It also reminded me that I have no idea what the next few years is going to bring. I'm a planner. This doesn't sit well with me. I take a deep breath. Remember that it will all work out, and thank the Lord that I have Taylor.

-Being at school has made me miss my Geneva friends. I have a great partner teacher, a wonderful mentor, but I miss my good ole' Geneva. Thanks Jenni for calling me with all the "updates!"

-I want to take pictures of our cute apartment, but as soon as I clean, it seems to be messy. Not messy, but I'm kinda a freak and I don't want to post pictures if they are not perfect. So look for pictures to come. We are constantly amazed by how much laundry, dishes and trash we have. And there is only two of us!